I remember counseling a couple who disagreed about money. Between them they earned just enough to pay the bills. The mother wanted their 3 teens to earn allowances by doing chores.
The father readily gave their teenagers money for whatever they wanted. He was their sugar daddy. They whined, pouted, and argued with their dad until he figured out a way to give them more dollars. He thought he was buying their love. He got what he paid for instead.
If you grew up poor, you might want your kids to have everything you didn't have. Perhaps as a kid, you had to work for what you wanted or you went without. Naturally, you don't want them to feel your childhood pain.
Cash in your child's pocket doesn't mean you're a great parent. It might mean something else. Why? Because the more you give your children, the more they'll demand.
I remember another mother who felt manipulated by her daughter. The mom desperately wanted her daughter's love and appreciation. But the only time the girl gave it occurred when her mom took her shopping for new clothes. Finally, her mother realized she was helping her child develop a selfish personality. It hurt.
These 5 problem behaviors can be avoided by raising your expectations
Many parents learn too late that giving kids too much creates spoiled children. No one wants self-centered, demanding, or thankless youngsters. Most parents hope their kids will embrace challenges and care about others. It can be done when parents expect more and give less. The benefits include family cooperation, pride in raising hardworking kids, and joy in rearing children who strive to make a positive difference in the world.
Do you come home to a messy house, dinner to fix, and a pile of dirty laundry? Are you tired all the time? Do you want help? You're in the right place.
Quit telling yourself, "It's easier if I do it myself."
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