Parents suffer when kids lack social skills. I remember the mother of a 6th grade girl who had no friends. I was a child counselor and this girl needed friendship skills.
Her mother asked me to visit her daughter's classroom. I noticed how awkward the girl appeared. She walked around the classroom when she should have been doing her work, avoided all eye contact, and wouldn't answer her teacher's questions. My heart went out to her.
Your child may have different social problems, but the result may be the same – no friends. It hurts to know your child is lonely. It's painful to realize that other kids ignore or even dislike her.
Our Social Skills Kit for Kids offers 50 specific exercises like:
Saying "Hi" with a friendly face
Looking kids in the eye when speaking
Smiling when talking to others
Saying each child's name often
Encouraging the other kid to talk about herself
Talking about the other child's interests
Offering fun ideas for playing together
Suggest your child focus on one skill. After she picks one, ask, "Why did you choose it? How will it help you? Think of a classmate whom you could talk with using this approach. If it doesn't work right away, how can you stay brave and keep trying?"
The purpose of the questions is to help her think clearly, positively, and stay motivated to practice. If she's still hesitant to approach kids socially, then urge her to role-play the skill with you.
Urge your child to practice the friendly action with you. Take turns playacting your child's part and the other child's response. Giggling is allowed. Make it fun. The next step is to expand the practice.
As she improves, involve the whole family. Ask everyone to use the skill with each other. If it's smiling and saying "Hi," urge the members to greet each other after they get up in the morning, when they come home from school, and whenever they've been away. This helps the skill become second nature and easier to perform outside the family.
Encourage your youngster to use the social skill outside your home. 'But how?' you wonder?
Ask the members of your family if they are willing to keep track of improving their social skills. A calendar might work or a chart for each member could be duplicated. Tally marks or stars can be used to make it even more fun. Reward progress. Examples of awards are:
Riding bikes together
Fixing a favorite meal
Playing a favorite game
Creating a treasure hunt
Solving a jigsaw puzzle
Resist the impulse to reward with money or toys. The best rewards include fun times together. Such times create special memories too.
What can you do? Keep reading and you'll find 4 simple steps you can take. Then reinforce what you learned with the short video below this article.
Life is hard when your child needs friends and you don't know how to help. Whether your child complains, “Nobody likes me,” or just needs a boost, you can help.
Your kids can make lifelong friendships today and become the successful communicators of tomorrow. Just choose which skills will help them most from the 50 social skills in this kit.
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